By Jennifer Naparstek Klein, Psy.D.

Nov. 30, 2016:  It is probably fair to say that sixty-one million Americans are elated by the 2016 presidential election results, and sixty-two million Americans are shattered.

No matter which group one falls into, 320 million Americans are aware that this has been, compared to any elections we can recall from recent history, a contentious, biting, hostile, and even alarming election cycle.  People on one side called for the other candidate to be sent to prison, and people on the opposing side referred to voters and politicians as "deplorable."  

Many people of all faiths feel discarded and demeaned, and people belonging to minority, immigrant, and LGBTQ communities feel threatened and afraid for their futures. Some who fall into none of the above demographics are simply horrified by what they have witnessed and by the constant, round-the-clock news coverage.   

Even after the election, the damage continues--there is much hatred and strife being expressed across our nation. Here in New York, individuals, public servants, and members of the media have received hateful communications, and there have been representations of hate, such as swastikas drawn or carved into privately owned homes and businesses. There have also been cries for violence in resistance to the new administration, which put many in fear of ongoing danger and instability.

What seems to be circulating in the way of ideas for managing one's stress is a combination of getting back to one's routine, getting involved in ways that can help your particular cause, limiting how much news coverage you follow, listening to your preferred leaders and theorists--taking guidance from trusted experts--and finding your equilibrium.  

Often, when we feel stressed and anxious, we lean into that anxiety in ways that can be destructive and exhausting.  It is critical, despite all of what is upsetting and threatening, that we find ways to be optimistic and forward-looking. Gandhi, an expert in maintaining calm in the face of fear, said, "You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty."  

Gandhi's thought seems helpful in the sense that if we think too hard about those with whom we disagree and give those thoughts and fears too much power, we cannot maintain or regain optimism. Gandhi promoted ideas like action and persistence in the face of fear and hopelessness.  

If everyone on both sides of the political spectrum can focus on positive change and pursuing goals through law and policy rather than hateful rhetoric and hateful action, we will likely get to a better place. 

The questions that arise about going forward include:

1. How do we heal and make repair following a divisive election cycle?

2. How does one regain optimism about our nation and regain faith in our collective community?

3. How did gender play a role in this election, and what constructive messages can women and men take from what has transpired?

4. How can we frame and address minority stress? If we belong to a demographic that has felt degraded in this election process, how can we feel safe?

5. How can we explain and continue to decode the vitriol from the election for our children? Will this be their perception of America, their country? Will they think of this as normal?

6. How do we maintain our relationships and connections to people who voted differently? If that person is a spouse, a mother, a father, a sibling--how do we move forward together?

At The Counseling Center in Bronxville, we have felt the stress ourselves and have witnessed it with our clientele. Therefore, we feel it is important that we explicitly let Bronxville residents and surrounding area residents know that we are here to support the community and to offer a place for healing and conversation.  

We intend to offer a short-term six-week conversation series targeting the above topics and any others that may arise. We plan to offer two times--one evening option and one daytime option. We are also here for anyone who prefers to meet for a handful of one-on-one sessions. 

If you are interested, please contact us at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it., or feel free to call us at 914-793-3388.

Pictured here:  Jennifer Naparstek Klein, Psy.D.

Photo courtesy The Counseling Center